Looking back on the past weeks/months, I would be curious to know the number of different answers given to the above question ;o) …
… I’m sure that many of us have a friend whose love has been stuck in another country for the last weeks/months and were only able to arrange a get-together under very challenging circumstances or whose love(s) comes from another country and currently they have to be separated and so on …
It would be easy to simply boil this question down to “country boundaries” and end this blog entry here, but I love complex things or at least finding solutions for them :o)) and especially examining them closely and deeply. Even now, I wasn’t thinking of country boundaries specifically, but rather those boundaries that exist within us. Nowadays, more and more people like to talk about love and many of them add that it should be unconditional. Does such love exist? And if so, where does it come from and where does it lead?
Nobody argues that love exists, but many question where it comes from. What’s funny is that things are often much more simple than they seem! What do I mean? Just that love comes directly from within us. Where else! There are people and situations to whom or to which we can readily give ourselves over to, forgetting about everybody and everything else, even ourselves.
However, even this so-called unconditional love cannot be equated with love without boundaries and is not equal to the situation where if we love someone, then he/she can do anything with or to us. Rather, the thing is that this somebody can only allow him/herself to do as much with us as we allow him/her to do. It happens very often that we give more than we would do wholeheartedly because we are afraid that “they won’t love us enough” or we won’t be “good enough”. Then, once we allow it to happen, it will happen a second, third … time and finally we will feel like we have become slaves. First, we accuse our family for this, then our circumstances and finally the whole world is to blame. Then, slowly we have to realize that actually we are the ones who didn’t say “no”, we are the ones who did not say “enough is enough!” Love turned into possession and possession into misery.
What is the solution then? ALWAYS and under ALL circumstances it is US who make our own decisions. It is not at all true that “we have no other choice”. There is always another choice! The question is only whether we respect ourselves or love ourselves enough to really choose the other option? Saying this “other choice” out loud is very difficult at first but it gets easier each and every time! It is worth sticking it out! And if anyone ever accuses us of being selfish, well “go ahead and do it”! This is just because we now love ourselves enough not to allow others to be selfish with us! And I can honestly say that this is an incredible feeling! <3
Back to the original question – loving without boundaries? On the one hand, YES because we can never know which country love will come from. On the other hand, NO because we have to respect and love ourselves enough to be able to set the boundaries where we can love unconditionally.
p.s. The astroscope can help us by discovering us which values need to be respected and loved mainly for ourselves.
